Digital Boundaries: Regaining Margin in Our Always Connected Culture

Pavlov's dog salivated when a bell was rung. The dog had been conditioned to associate the bell with food. There are days I feel like that dog. Instant messaging notifications chime from my phone and instantly I feel the urge to respond. I equate phone notifications to a person standing behind me all day long tapping me on my shoulder at inopportune times and stealing attention from the flow of my work, my relationships, and my activities. It is insanity. 

Unpopular Opinion: Just because you have a device in your pocket that makes you available to anyone in the free world at any moment of the day, does not mean you are required to be available to everyone in the free world at any moment of the day. These are expectations our culture has created and like other types of expectations, they have to be managed. What becomes part of our culture is what we collectively allow as individuals. If you hope to have time to rest and recharge, be fully present with others, or enter into deep workflow states, you have to be able to silence the noise of life and limit the interruptions. Untraining our current behaviors takes time. It may not happen overnight, but pushing back against the culture by establishing digital boundaries is one way to regain and retain margin in this 24/7 culture we live in.

Unpopular Opinion: Just because you have a device in your pocket that makes you available to anyone in the free world at any moment of the day, does not mean you are required to be available to everyone in the free world at any moment of the day.

Establish Digital Work Boundaries

Silence and limit notifications

Like Pavlov's dog, the sound of an incoming text, email, or app notification has the potential to cause a physical or emotional reaction in us whether at rest or during peak work periods. It feels like a distraction or one more thing to do. It can steal us away from whatever we have our focus on if only for a moment. However, hundreds of these little moments of interruptions per day steal large blocks of our time. So, silence the distraction. Years ago I turned off instant notifications on my phone and laptop for work emails. Most of my time each day is spent in front of my email or close to my email anyway, so I don't need to be audibly notified of every new email. Also, if I am in a meeting or on a conference call, I need to be fully present in the meeting and not distracted. The email app on my phone is set to notify me of new emails once per hour in case I am traveling, doing an onsite visit, or at a conference. If I am doing deep work on a complex project, I also silence my phone and close my email. My email notifications are also turned off from 5pm through 8am every day. I still check my work emails almost every night later in the evening, but it is at my leisure and not being continually forced on me in real-time. 

Utilize Voicemail

Not everyone's phone call needs to be answered immediately. I know, another unpopular opinion. Let it roll to voicemail. Here's the thing: You might pick up the phone and answer a question in a matter of minutes once you've dealt with pleasantries, small talk, etc., or you might be on the phone for the next 30 minutes. Can your current flow or project be interrupted for that amount of time? If not, don't answer it. Voicemail is there for a reason. It is your own personal receptionist, use it. If it's important, they will leave you a message or call back. However, much of the time I find when I call someone back, they have already solved the problem themselves. That is a win-win. They figured it out without your help and you worked uninterrupted until you had time to call them back.

Create Digital Breaks Outside of Work Hours

Be ok with being unavailable

Beyond work, my phone goes into silent mode at midnight and turns on again at 8am. I have family contacts and a few close friends that could reach me during those hours based on notification settings but I am unavailable during those hours to the rest of the world. If I am resting or napping, my phone goes into silent mode. When I am writing, practicing my spiritual disciplines (Bible study/prayer/solitude), or exercising, my notifications are silenced. This allows me time for thinking, deep work, and reflection.

Practice Digital Fasting

Somedays we just need to put the phone away. Let those closest to you know that you are going to be offline for a day or half a day. Go for a hike. Go fishing. Take a long walk. Read until your heart is content. Go have coffee with a friend. Let the sun shine on your face. Notice the little details of life. Be fully present with the people you love. Untether from the technology and be present in the moment. Take time for your mind and body to heal from living under the weight of being constantly available. Your physical, emotional, and mental health are extremely important. Cut the digital leash once in a while and enjoy the freedom!